His thoughts were occasionally directed to this point. "Yes," hewould repeat to himself, with ill-concealed dissatisfaction, "yes,this is, after all, the extent of that confiding, dear, tender,and sympathetic love, that calm and eternal fidelity! What do Ibehold but satiety and indifference? Does not every frivolousengagement attract him more than his charming and lovely wife?Does he know how to prize his happiness? Can he value her as shedeserves? He possesses her, it is true, I know that, as I knowmuch more, and I have become accustomed to the thought that hewill drive me mad, or, perhaps, murder me. Is his friendshiptoward me unimpaired? Does he not view my attachment to Charlotteas an infringement upon his rights, and consider my attention toher as a silent rebuke to himself? I know, and indeed feel, thathe dislikes me, that he wishes for my absence, that my presenceis hateful to him."。， OCTOBER 27.
。， She was engaged for the second country dance, but promised me thethird, and assured me, with the most agreeable freedom, that shewas very fond of waltzing. "It is the custom here," she said,"for the previous partners to waltz together; but my partner isan indifferent waltzer, and will feel delighted if I save him thetrouble. Your partner is not allowed to waltz, and, indeed, isequally incapable: but I observed during the country dance thatyou waltz well; so, if you will waltz with me, I beg you wouldpropose it to my partner, and I will propose it to yours." Weagreed, and it was arranged that our partners should mutuallyentertain each other.
AUGUST 22.。， He regards me as a man of sense; and my attachment to Charlotte,and the interest I take in all that concerns her, augment histriumph and his love. I shall not inquire whether he may not attimes tease her with some little jealousies; as I know, that, wereI in his place, I should not be entirely free from such sensations.
。， My days are as happy as those reserved by God for his elect; and,whatever be my fate hereafter, I can never say that I have nottasted joy, -- the purest joy of life. You know Walheim. I amnow completely settled there. In that spot I am only half a leaguefrom Charlotte; and there I enjoy myself, and taste all the pleasurewhich can fall to the lot of man.
。， She is still with her dying friend, and is still the same bright,beautiful creature whose presence softens pain, and sheds happinessaround whichever way she turns. She went out yesterday with herlittle sisters: I knew it, and went to meet them; and we walkedtogether. In about an hour and a half we returned to the town.We stopped at the spring I am so fond of, and which is now athousand times dearer to me than ever. Charlotte seated herselfupon the low wall, and we gathered about her. I looked around,and recalled the time when my heart was unoccupied and free."Dear fountain!" I said, "since that time I have no more come toenjoy cool repose by thy fresh stream: I have passed thee withcareless steps, and scarcely bestowed a glance upon thee." Ilooked down, and observed Charlotte's little sister, Jane, comingup the steps with a glass of water. I turned toward Charlotte,and I felt her influence over me. Jane at the moment approachedwith the glass. Her sister, Marianne, wished to take it from her."No!" cried the child, with the sweetest expression of face,"Charlotte must drink first."
JULY 13.。， "Charlotte," I said, as I took her hand in mine, and my eyes filledwith tears, "we shall see each other again -- here and hereafterwe shall meet again." I could say no more. Why, Wilhelm, shouldshe put this question to me, just at the monent when the fear ofour cruel separation filled my heart?
。， "Your profile, which was so dear to me, I return to you; and Ipray you to preserve it. Thousands of kisses have I imprintedupon it, and a thousand times has it gladdened my heart on departingfrom and returning to my home.
Albert, upon his return, was received by Charlotte withill-concealed embarrassment. He was himself out of humour; hisbusiness was unfinished; and he had just discovered that theneighbouring official with whom he had to deal, was an obstinateand narrow-minded personage. Many things had occurred to irritatehim.。，
I must away. Thank you, Wilhelm, for determining my waveringpurpose. For a whole fortnight I have thought of leaving her. Imust away. She has returned to town, and is at the house of afriend. And then, Albert -- yes, I must go.。， Charlotte has reproved me for my excesses, with so much tendernessand goodness! I have lately been in the habit of drinking morewine than heretofore. "Don't do it," she said. "Think of Charlotte!""Think of you!" I answered; "need you bid me do so? Think of you-- I do not think of you: you are ever before my soul! This verymorning I sat on the spot where, a few days ago, you descendedfrom the carriage, and--" She immediately changed the subject toprevent me from pursuing it farther. My dear friend, my energiesare all prostrated: she can do with me what she pleases.
，。， I sometimes cannot understand how she can love another, how shedares love another, when I love nothing in this world so completely,so devotedly, as I love her, when I know only her, and have noother possession.